This past Saturday evening I was in a cab looking for a KFC when I came upon an enjoyable sight. As we pulled up towards a corner, I saw two men, one skinny and one brawny, engaged in an animated argument. Suddenly, the shorter one jumped up in the air and slapped the bigger one, and then proceeded to run away as fast as he could. I had never seen anything like this before. All of us had heard about the Shanghainese man’s infamous brazen mouth and cowardly fist; they’re skilled at yelling at each other, but flying spittle is as far as it gets to physical contact. This was something new: the revolutionary “slap and run” strategy, where the first slap comes as such a surprise, that the slapper gets nearly a 10 second head start on the slapee. Shanghai is a very flat city, with lots of dark alleys with vomit-inducing odors, and maybe the strategy included “making the chaser very tired” or “making the chaser want to vomit.” All excellent demonstrations of power and strength, and no doubt an indicator of the growing self-confidence of the Shanghainese.

I was actually on my way to a KTV session with these two Australian dudes (friends of Jenny) who I had met the previous night at Guandii. One of them is named Yun, the other one is Yang. It’s no wonder that the sight of the two of them standing next to each other JUST didn’t look right. I liked it better when Yang hung out with Yin; it’s a shame about that falling out. Must be global warming.

For the past two Saturdays, I found myself waking up around noon-time still completely drunk. Both times my eyes were bloodshot and my entire person was red and splotchy. Thankfully, this past Saturday was better than the previous one, in which I found myself around 4 o’clock screaming up at the ceiling: “God, when is this going to stop?!” At which point God replied: “Beer before liquor…”

I’m heading to Beijing on Thursday with Clint to get a head start on the National Holiday. After staying at Dave’s place (he’ll be in Thailand) and making sure that every corner of his house is pee’ed on, Clint and I and Steve and Clare will take the sleeper train out to Qingdao to check out seafood and the hundred different types of beer they have there. Yes folks, now you know why I put off working out until I get back.

“But Eric, you started putting it off about seven months ago!”

Whoa, who typed that? Time to bring out the “slap and run.” Until next time…